


silence hides a million words (so listen closely, my dear)

by Pineless



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Goodbyes, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Panic Attacks, Platonic Relationships, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-25 18:01:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30092976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pineless/pseuds/Pineless
Summary: Sapnap gave Dream a sharp look. “What do you mean?” He snapped with an unnecessary amount of irritation, though he was unable to mask the exhaustion in his voice. “Why would we need to go to another town?”Something strangely vindictive settled in Dream’s expression. Abruptly, he leapt to his feet, and made his way determinedly toward the only window in the room. He hesitated in front of it for a long moment, his hands hovering inches away from the closed curtains.“Dream-” George started, but it was too late.“Thisis why we need to move.” In one swift, calculated movement, Dream seized the curtains and tore them open.ORIt’s the apocalypse and the Dream Team is trapped in their own base. Even if they play their cards right, only one of them can get out.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Zak Ahmed & GeorgeNotFound
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	silence hides a million words (so listen closely, my dear)

**Author's Note:**

> hi to anyone who’s reading this! this is my first ever fanfic (and it’s about Minecraft block men haha), and also the first time I’ve posted anything on AO3. thanks for taking the time to check out this story :]
> 
> Warning! i’m not a good writer and this fic was really just for me to practice my writing more. it’s probably very cringe and OOC so please don’t judge too much lol
> 
> DISCLAIMER: All characters in this story (and in any other fanfics I write) are based on these content creators’ PERSONAS only! So even though this story is based in real life, I’m using minecraft names and personalities. Also, this fic is intended to be platonic only :]
> 
> CW: Major character deaths (implied), semi-suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, lots of crying
> 
> enjoy! :]

To many, it would seem that getting through the harsh first wave of the apocalypse is a guarantee of survival. But there were hundreds, even thousands more problems that sprung up, even after the few survivors became accustomed to the new, terrifying world.

George knew this all too well. He had lost his family and nearly all of his friends at the start, and was left curled up and crying in a corner for hours. (He missed them, but knew that he had to live on for them.) Within a day after the first wave, he had nearly been mugged by a group of mean-spirited thugs. (He couldn’t really blame them for wanting to survive just a little longer, even if it meant harming another human.) His supplies had been slowly dwindling away ever since the start of it all. (It didn’t matter, he was just one person and he could ration if it came to it.) He became used to sleeping lightly, springing up at the softest sound and constantly staying on high alert. (His sleeping schedule was already messed up anyways.)

But George also knew that he was among the luckiest. By some miracle, he had found his two best friends; Dream and Sapnap. They had been visiting him in Britain when the apocalypse first struck, but by circumstance, George had been separated from the two. 

He could remember their first encounter with each other all too well. While looting buildings for supplies, George had stumbled into their temporary base without realizing that it was occupied. Both younger men had been prepared to fight him, until they recognized each other. Neither side had quite believed their eyes at first, as both had believed the other was dead.

It was safe to say that none of them had ever shed more tears than they did that night, even if they were tears of joy.

After the reunion, they had created a more permanent base out of the most secure building in the area; a laboratory with an iron fence surrounding its perimeter.

Every day for the entire month after, George was filled with gratitude for his friends. Though they all wore tired expressions and walked with a heaviness in their step, they still found the energy to joke and laugh with each other. They still had the compassion to comfort one another on bad days, when the cruel truth of the ruined world hit them more forcefully than ever. 

He even treasured the silence that sometimes filled the base. Quiet moments were always pleasant and calm, as more often than not, they would be comfortably focusing on their tasks or relaxing.

But recently, something had been nagging at the back of their minds. They tried their best to ignore it, filling the air with jokes and laughter. But the thoughts always returned, and the problem never vanished.

Today was a bad day for them. It didn’t help that the room was abnormally quiet, allowing his mind to freely explore unwelcome thoughts. George tried hard to push away the thoughts as he fiddled with the levers on the wall, but subconsciously, he knew he couldn’t avoid it forever. Not when he’d already been avoiding it for weeks. Not when half of him thought them all stupid for blatantly ignoring such a huge problem.

Abruptly, George realized that the quiet atmosphere in the room was tense and uncomfortable, unlike their usual enjoyable mood. He glanced up from his own work to scrutinize his two best friends.

Sapnap was on the opposite side of the room. He too was flipping levers and pushing buttons, but there was a faraway look in his eyes that showed he wasn’t really paying attention. George’s eyes flicked down to the bandages wrapped around his torso and left leg, and he held back a sympathetic wince.

Dream sat next to George. Unlike the other two, he appeared to be completely immersed in his work. As George watched, Dream carefully screwed a bolt onto an oddly-shaped canister. The sight of the canister only served to remind George even more of his worries, and he quickly looked away again.

Out of the corner of his eyes, George saw Sapnap start to glance repeatedly at him, then away again. The older man averted his gaze, hoping desperately that the other wouldn’t initiate conversation.

He had no such luck. “Hey, George.” Sapnap spoke up abruptly. Dream looked up at the two, his brow furrowed. “How…how much water do we have left?” The youngest man’s voice was unnaturally quiet and hoarse. George knew exactly why.

George pretended to flip a last couple of switches, trying to ignore the other two’s stares. But he knew they could tell he was stalling, so with badly concealed reluctance, George reached instead for a bag sitting at his feet.

He made a show of rifling through it, taking a few seconds longer than he should have. For a moment, George paused and just sat there, his brows furrowed as he peered into the bag’s depths. Finally, he pulled out a slightly dirty water bottle about halfway full with water.

Dream grimaced, setting down his strange contraption. Whether his distaste was in response to the sight of the grime coating the bottle, or from the lack of water, George couldn’t tell. “Is that all? What about food?” Dream added more hopefully.

George bit his lip, not wanting to meet Dream’s optimistic gaze. “That’s…that’s all we have left.” His voice cracked slightly at the end of his sentence, and he tried desperately to convince himself that it was solely because of his parched throat. 

Though George was trying his best not to look directly at his friends, he could sense the look that they exchanged. “We haven’t drunk any water in an entire day now, and we haven’t eaten for even longer…” Sapnap murmured, his voice still soft.

George finally glanced at his younger friend. The anxiety on Sapnap’s face was apparent, and there was something deeper and darker underneath. Though his tone was calm and far from distraught, it was easy to tell that Sapnap was close to breaking point.

As if he couldn’t bear to see his friend’s vulnerability, Dream turned away from him. “That’s only enough for one person, I’d say.” He gestured half-heartedly at the bottle in George’s hand. “At least, enough for one person to survive long enough to reach the next town.”

Sapnap gave Dream a sharp look. “What do you mean?” He snapped with an unnecessary amount of irritation, though he was unable to mask the exhaustion in his voice. “Why would we need to go to another town?”

Something strangely vindictive settled in Dream’s expression. Abruptly, he leapt to his feet, and made his way determinedly toward the only window in the room. He hesitated in front of it for a long moment, his hands hovering inches away from the closed curtains.

“Dream-” George started, but it was too late. 

“ _This_ is why we need to move.” In one swift, calculated movement, Dream seized the curtains and tore them open. Both George and Sapnap flinched, looking away from the window.

“Oh-” George heard Dream’s voice falter, all brashness leaving his tone. “Oh God.” The uneven patter of footsteps told George that the younger man had stumbled backward. “They…they’re everywhere.”

Taking a deep breath, George turned to face the window. He couldn’t stifle a gasp of his own as he felt nausea rise in him. 

Hundreds of great, black _things_ were milling around the outside terrain. The monsters were everywhere; crawling flat against the ground, perched in the trees, and even hovering unsupported a few feet above the ground. The only thing keeping them away from the building was the flimsy fence that wound around the laboratory.

With trembling hands, Dream shut the curtains again. He slumped back into his seat, looking like he’d just ran a marathon. “I swear they’ve doubled.” Dream muttered, closing his eyes. It looked like he was trying to erase the image of the monsters from his own mind.

Sapnap was the only one who hadn’t looked out the window. He remained turned resolutely away, his eyes screwed shut. “No.” Sapnap whispered shakily. One of his hands was clutching his bandaged side tightly. In that moment of weakness, George was suddenly reminded of the fact that Sapnap was the youngest of the trio. He certainly looked young and small now.

“Hey, hey.” Dream was suddenly up again, moving to kneel next to the younger man. He spoke with a lower, more comforting voice than usual. “We’ll be okay.”

George joined him a second later, and laid his own hand on Sapnap’s. “They can’t hurt you from here.” He assured as he gently pried Sapnap’s hand away from his own side, trying not to wince at the slight red tinge of the bandages. “I know what happened was really…bad. But it won’t happen again.”

Sapnap took a few deep breaths, his eyes still tightly closed. “I’m fine.” He said finally, albeit a little breathlessly. “I just keep remembering it.”

Dream gave Sapnap’s shoulder a little squeeze of reassurance. He tried to keep his face calm, but it was still clear that the sight of Sapnap’s pain was breaking his heart. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, regret in his voice. “We shouldn’t have taken such a risk.”

Sapnap’s eyes flew open and he gave Dream a halfhearted glare. “What else could we have done?” He demanded, though there was no real bite to his words. “We needed someone to test if we could safely get through the monsters and leave the base.” Sapnap’s gaze dropped. “And we got our answer.”

An uncomfortable silence settled over them. Dream’s brow was furrowed as he took his hand away from Sapnap’s shoulder and switched to sitting cross-legged on the ground. 

George kept his hand on the younger man’s, unaware of how tightly he was clutching it. Thoughts and ideas were chasing each other around in his mind, and he was itching to say something. But the silence was suffocating and weighed heavily on him, making his mind spin with confusion. Unknowingly, George gripped Sapnap’s hand even tighter, as if his friend’s hand was the only thing keeping him anchored to reality.

To give himself something to do, George stuffed the water bottle - which was still in his free hand - back into his bag. When he looked back up, he was disappointed to see that neither of his friends had moved a single inch.

“Guys…” George prompted, hating the way his voice wavered slightly from exhaustion and pain. He faltered for a moment, almost backing out of the conversation again. But it had to be done. And if no one else was going to initiate the discussion, George would take the burden. “Guys, what’s going to happen next?”

Dream kept his eyes fixed on his own intertwined hands. He looked just as uncomfortable and anxious as George felt, and also so, so tired. Sapnap’s face was pale, but he gave George a weak smile and lightly squeezed the older man’s hand as he spoke. “I…I don’t know, George.”

George stared at him, his mouth slightly open in disbelief. Was Sapnap really _still_ trying to avoid the truth? Even when the time had finally come to confront it?

An irrational anger filled him, burning at his insides and making the fog in his mind shrivel into nothingness. It made him feel powerful, if not a bit reckless. He let go of Sapnap as his own trembling hands curled into fists.

“What is that supposed to mean? I know that you know _exactly_ what’s going to happen.” George snapped fiercely, ignoring his common sense. He sprang to his feet and took a few angry steps backward. “Stop trying to run away from the truth! Stop being such _cowards_!”

Everything was falling apart. Every emotion he had felt since the beginning of the apocalypse, every dark thought that plagued him for the past few weeks, every dizzying surge of feelings that had threatened to overtake him. George had locked everything deep inside his heart for too long. Now it all came spilling out; each word he uttered was filled with a storm of rage and pure, unfiltered emotion.

He barely registered the distressed looks on his friends’ faces. He was blind to the sorrow in their gazes. “That’s exactly what got us into this situation in the first place!” George threw out an arm toward the closed curtains, gesturing at the window hidden behind them. “Do you remember two weeks ago? Do you remember when we woke up and there were just a _few_ monsters waiting outside the fences? Do you remember how we decided to wait it out?”

“George, I-” Dream tried to interject, his eyes wide. 

But George whirled on him, almost snarling. “Do you _still_ want to wait? Even after we waited for _weeks_ and found ourselves in the middle of _hundreds_ of monsters? Are you really going to wait until we all starve to death?” His voice quivered slightly, still full of emotion. But the anger had faded from George’s expression, replaced by despair.

George took a shaky breath in, leaving behind a ringing silence, charged with tension and unspoken words. Slowly his mind began to calm, now empty of all its bottled-up emotions, and his vision cleared. He blinked, taking in the sight of his friends’ troubled faces.

“I-I’m sorry.” George muttered guiltily, glancing away. “But I meant what I said.”

“George…” Sapnap murmured, still looking stricken. “I—I’m so sorry. We were stupid not to act sooner.” He clenched his hands tightly on the arms of his chair, his face white.

The older man let out a hollow laugh. “It’s too late, isn’t it?” George’s voice broke slightly. “We’re going to starve to death. There aren’t any more supplies in this area. Even if we somehow could escape from here without getting killed, we would all die before reaching the next town.”

“There’s another way.” Dream spoke for the first time in several minutes. He looked extremely reluctant and apprehensive, but met his two friends’ questioning gazes with his own ready stare. “Do—do you remember the plan?”

George’s eyes widened, while Sapnap glanced quickly at the switches and levers lining the walls. “The plan?” The youngest echoed, trying and failing to put up a pretense of surprise. “I…well…” Sapnap looked inquiringly at George. “What do you think?”

George’s eyes flicked between Sapnap, Dream, the wall, and the strange little contraption that sat near Dream’s vacant seat. The cogs in his brain worked feverishly. “Why are you asking me?” He asked quickly, trying to buy himself more time to think.

Dream looked slightly confused. “Well, you’re the one who worked on the explosives the most.”

“...Was I.” George’s voice was missing the inflection of a question, making his words sound more like a statement. He picked up the contraption, turning it over and over in his hands.

“Yes, you were.” Sapnap affirmed, sounding annoyed. “And weren’t you the one screaming at us to stop stalling and try to be productive?” George winced slightly but kept his eyes fixed on the thing in his hands. “So, get on with it. Will the plan work?”

George finally looked up. “It depends.” He answered honestly. “I’m no expert on explosives. But I have been working on the system a lot recently.” _In preparation_. The phrase went unspoken, but everyone could feel it behind George’s words.

Dream leaned forward, seemingly subconsciously. “And?” He prompted curiously.

“This room is fortified.” George gestured vaguely around at the walls. “If the explosives go off, then this room shouldn’t be harmed.”

Both of his friends nodded. “That’s good.” Sapnap said, sounding slightly more hopeful than before. 

To George’s slight puzzlement, Dream continued to look grim and troubled. “How big is the blast radius?” The younger man asked.

George considered for a moment, fiddling unconsciously with the contraption. “I’m not exactly sure.” He admitted. “But it definitely won’t be able to reach the outside of the base…”

“...So if we want to use the explosives…” Sapnap said slowly.

“...we’ll have to bring the monsters inside the base.” Dream finished. He collapsed back into his seat and slumped forward, burying his face in his hands. “This is so messed up.” He muttered. “This plan was always just supposed to be a joke.”

For a few moments they all grimaced, foreseeing the unpleasant business of inviting such monsters into their home. “But we can just open the fences and the doors, then hide in this room!” Sapnap piped up suddenly, his eyes bright. “Then we’ll be able to explode them!”

He looked expectantly at his older friends, who were both unnaturally quiet. Dream slowly sat upright again, looking grim. George turned away, seeming to be completely immersed in carefully attaching the contraption to a bolt on the wall. He lingered there for as long as possible, taking time to secure the last metal brace before turning back to Sapnap. But neither met the younger’s expectant gaze, though both looked troubled and even guilty. 

“Well?” Sapnap said, the glimmer of hope in his eyes fading slightly as the silence wore on. 

Both George and Dream spoke at the same time, their words tumbling hurriedly over each other.

“I’m sorry, I lied, the blast-” George blurted apologetically, turning to Sapnap with wide eyes.

“That won’t work, I’ve been experimenting-” Dream burst out, as if he was finally revealing a long-kept secret.

Both abruptly cut themselves off once they realized that the other was speaking, glancing fearfully around. Sapnap looked between his two friends, nonplussed. “What?”

“I’ve been experimenting with the monsters outside.” Dream started talking again, the words spilling from him like he couldn’t hold them in any longer. “I—I knew you wouldn’t approve, so I kept quiet about it…” His voice trailed off feebly.

Sapnap stared at him incredulously. “You messed around with the monsters?” He asked in a disbelieving voice. “Even after you saw how dangerous they are?”

“I wasn’t messing around!” Dream shot back angrily. He took a deep, steadying breath and continued, his voice more level than before. “I just opened the doors a few times to test if the monsters would come in. And they didn’t.” Dream looked off to the side, not meeting either of his friends’ gazes. “Not until I actually went outside.”

Sapnap opened his mouth to exclaim angrily, but George threw out a hand in his direction. “Stop.” He told the younger man firmly. “Let Dream speak.” Sapnap looked a bit miffed, but closed his mouth again.

Dream shot George a grateful look. “When the monsters saw me, they started coming toward me. But as soon as I got back inside and closed the doors again, they seemed to forget that I was even there. And based on some, uh, other things that I did,” He barrelled on, even as Sapnap looked furious again. “I came to the conclusion that the monsters won’t chase you unless you’re actually in close proximity to them, or if they see you.”

George’s heart sank. “So we can’t just open the doors and let them in.” He said quietly. “That…that’s not good.” The man finished lamely.

Sapnap was quiet for a few seconds, staring scrutinizingly at Dream. “Yeah, that’s not very good.” He said finally.

“I haven’t forgiven you yet for being so reckless,” Sapnap added as an expression of relief crossed Dream’s face. “You could have gotten hurt. Badly.” His hand rested briefly on his side injury. “But I know that your intentions were good.”

Dream let out a shaky sigh, looking grateful. “Thank you. And I’m sorry.”

Sapnap exhaled forcefully, though not enough to be a sigh. “So, if we can’t just let the monsters wander in, then we’ll have to bait them inside.”

“And even once they’re inside, you have to keep being bait.” Dream added. “As soon as you barricade yourself into a safe place, or outrun them, they won’t follow you anymore.” He fell back into an uneasy silence, as if pondering the gravity of his own words.

Sapnap nodded slightly, his expression of pretend calm never wavering, and turned to George. “And what were you saying?”

“I…” George faltered for a moment, looking scared. “I’m sorry, I do know the blast radius of the explosives. At least, partially.”

“Then why bother to lie?” Sapnap said, a little harshly. “Sorry.” He added in a more apologetic tone as George flinched.

“The two explosives are located at opposite sides of the building.” The older man explained, completely ignoring both Sapnap’s question and his apology. “They’re…well, they’re really far away from this room. And from the entrances. They’re basically in the heart of this building.”

“You know how big this lab is.” George’s gaze flickered nervously toward the door. “I may not know the _exact_ blast radius, but I know that the monsters have to be near the explosives - which means far from the entrance and from here - for the explosives to be effective.” He tried to control the quiver in his voice.

Silence stretched between them, thick and full of tension as they slowly came to terms with the new information. George’s hands were clenched tightly into fists as he waited for someone to speak. For someone to say what they all already realized.

But no one spoke. Sapnap tapped his fingers idly against his uninjured leg, his unfocused eyes fixed on his bandages. It was clear that he was lost in his own mind. Dream had his head in his hands again, hiding his face and his expression from view.

George looked at them. But instead of a surge of anger in response to their unwillingness to act, he felt a wave of regret and bitterness. They didn’t deserve to be shoved into this situation; they were younger than him, for God’s sake. None of them deserved this.

He decided to be the one to break the silence and bring the uncomfortable truth into light. It was the least he could do for his friends. “The…the monsters are fast.” George swallowed, trying to ignore the lump in his throat. “They’re strong too.” 

He could feel his eyes starting to burn, but ignored it in favor of continuing. “There’s no other way. The alternative is that we all starve to death, or we’re all killed while trying to escape. I think we all know this already, but if we follow the plan…” George could feel his mouth forming the next words, but nothing came out except for a strangled exhale. 

He couldn’t say it. Speaking the truth out loud would make it more real. Saying it would make it happen, and George had never wanted something to happen less in his life.

His two friends were looking at him now, sadness in both their gazes. “George…it’s okay. It’ll be okay.” Dream got to his feet and reached out toward him hesitantly. Only then did George realize that he had started crying.

“I—” George’s hands shot up to his face and he hastily tried to wipe away his tears. “No—it won’t—” Dream pulled the older man into a hug, successfully cutting off his rambling.

“George…” Sapnap got up unsteadily and started to move toward the two, but stumbled slightly. He looked down at his injured leg with an expression of pure frustration, obviously angered by the limitations of the wound.

George let out a choked whimper, as heavy tears rolled down his cheeks. He practically ran at Sapnap, pulling Dream behind him, and engulfed the youngest man in a hug too. Dream wrapped his arms around both his friends, being careful with Sapnap’s injuries.

“I—I don’t want to die. But I don’t want either of you to die either.” George’s voice wavered pitifully as he spoke. Dream rubbed George’s back consolingly, even as the younger man began to shake with his own silent tears.

Sapnap sniffled as he hugged his friends back. “I love you guys, so much.” He said shakily. “You mean the world to me.”

George let out a sob, pulling both men closer to him, not caring that their tears were soaking his shirt.

“I’ll never forget you.” Dream vowed fiercely, his voice rough and broken from crying. “No matter whether I live or die. You guys made my life so much better. I can’t even say how thankful I am for you.”

“Thank you so much for everything.” George cried. “For all the memories. For all the happiness you brought me. I—” He had to stop for a moment as sobs racked his body. Dream’s comforting hand was still present on his back, and Sapnap began to run a soothing hand through his hair. “I w-wish we could have spent m-more time together…”

They were all crying messes now, standing in the middle of the room, in each others’ embraces. The rest of the world seemed to fade away - the ominous levers on the walls and the monsters becoming meaningless - leaving them at the center of everything. All that mattered was each other.

At some point they ended up on the ground, still clutching each other tightly as if the world would end if they let go.

Time passed hazily, as they slowly began to calm down. George and Sapnap were cuddled up to Dream, safe in his warm embrace and comforted by the way he slowly rocked them back and forth.

Occasionally Dream would pull one of them closer and press a gentle kiss to the top of their head, his eyes closed but with tears running silently down his cheeks. It was impossible to tell exactly what was going through his mind at those times, but both of his friends would always lean obligingly into Dream’s touch, causing him to relax slightly.

George whispered stories and memories to the other two - both of the happy and the sad times. He choked up whenever the emotions became too strong for him, at which the other two would hug him closer and murmur encouraging words to him.

Sapnap held his two friends’ hands in both of his own, running his thumb over their knuckles and soothingly rubbing circles into their palms. He repeated his actions over and over, yet never seemed to grow bored, as if he were determined to memorize every detail of his best friends’ hands.

Even when all three grew quiet and just held each other tightly, the silence that came was tranquil and warm. There were no more secrets or guilt lurking in the quietude.

It was over. They knew it was the end. So there was nothing left between them, no more evil separating the friends. All that remained was unspoken love (there was no need to put their love into words).

Though the curtains were closed, it was clear that the sun was setting. The golden sunlight that slanted through the gaps became orange, then a dark amber. During quiet spells, George could almost hear the growls and footsteps of the monsters lurking outside.

He knew that the longer they waited, the lower the chances would be. The monsters would continue to multiply, until their sheer numbers would overwhelm the base entirely. All of them knew.

But George couldn’t bring himself to pull away again. It would be too painful to put up another facade of calm in order to do what must be done, even if the other two could see right through it. He never wanted to let go of his friends again. 

Breaking apart would signify their eternal separation, and George knew that none of them could bear the pain of it.

So why did they have to? What was stopping him from sitting there forever, wrapped in his friends’ warm embraces? What was stopping him from passing on peacefully, accompanied by the only two who still mattered to him?

George entertained himself with thoughts of his wish, as he tightened his grip on Dream and squeezed Sapnap’s hand with his own. Deep down, he knew why he would rather die gruesomely to a monster and an explosion, than peacefully in his friends’ arms.

It was his love for them. If there was any chance at all, no matter how slim, that even one of them could survive…George knew that none of them would pass up on it.

Even if it meant the deaths of the other two.

They could feel their time running out, in the way that hunger tore at their insides and exhaustion filled their minds. Sapnap’s weak coughs frequently filled the air, and Dream’s body often shook from hunger pangs. George could feel himself weakening with every passing minute, as he slowly sagged deeper into his friends’ arms. 

The sounds outside grew steadily louder, their ominous implications hanging over all of their heads. Soon, the growls of the monsters had multiplied, harmonizing with each other in a malicious chorus. For as long as possible, the three chose to ignore the world around them, blissfully reveling in each other’s company.

But all good things come to an end. Dream was the first to pull away, moving slowly like it physically pained him to let go of his friends. His eyes were blurred with falling tears, and filled with regret. “We…we can’t stay here forever.” He whispered hoarsely, his voice full of emotion.

George’s eyes were still closed as he mourned the loss of Dream’s warmth, his tears falling faster than ever. He clutched Sapnap’s hand tightly, deathly scared of letting go, and stifled a broken sob as Sapnap squeezed his hand comfortingly before releasing it.

Slowly, reluctantly, the three got to their feet. Dream helped pull Sapnap up, and let the younger lean on him. George rubbed at his eyes furiously, trying to wipe away the tears.

For a moment, they stood there just looking at each other. They knew that this might be one of the last times that they would ever see each other again.  
“W-Who is it g-going to b-be?” George stuttered out, his breath hitching as he spoke. Despite his vague question, he could tell that both his friends understood. Dream hesitantly stretched out a hand to him, and George reached for it immediately, grateful for the contact again.

But no one replied.

And silence fell over them again.  
\- - - - -

It feels like the world is crashing down around him.

Funny, because he’s still far from the button that will blow the laboratory sky-high.

Sobs tear through his body as he slumps against the wall and curls into himself. He can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t do anything but continue to sink into swirling grief and cry his eyes out.

They’re gone.

They’re dead. And all for what?

And he suddenly remembers.

He clutches the walkie talkie so tightly that his knuckles turn white. It’s been silent for far too long. The only sounds around him are his own anguished cries. The silence only reminds him more of what he has just lost.

It takes all of his strength to pull himself to his feet and stand on trembling legs, in front of the small and unimportant-looking button. His own life and the lives of his friends weigh heavily on his shoulders.

He is barely aware of the tears rolling down his cheeks as he gazes blurrily at the button. A single touch would obliterate the creatures responsible for all their pain, all their strife. But he can’t bring himself to destroy the last memories he has with his friends too.

Somewhere within him, there is a tiny, wavering light of hope. Maybe his friends were still alive. Maybe, somehow, this was all just a bad joke. He turns his head to the door, half expecting them to come crashing through at any moment, laughing uproariously at the prank they had just played. He would give anything at that moment just to hear their voices again, full of love and happiness.

But of course he is still alone. The world is still as silent as always.

He lets out a shuddering breath and faces the button once more. This is no time to lose his grip. He has to do it, or everything will have been done in vain.

Before he can reconsider again, he raises a trembling hand and slams it into the button.

For a split second, he wonders if the explosives even work at all, or if the room would protect him from the blast. He almost welcomes the thought. He will gladly fall into the embrace of death. There is nothing left to live for, if he is alone.

Then the ground shakes violently beneath him. He falls to the floor with a gasp, too weak to keep his balance. A deafening roar reaches his ears,

and then there is nothing.  
\- - - - -

It was late afternoon when he stumbled into the town. His exhausted eyes roved around, taking in the unfamiliar buildings and piles of debris. Half of him wished that the town would be deserted and void of supplies, if it meant that he could see his friends again. Even if it was in the afterlife.

But as soon as he set foot into the area, he saw signs of recent activity. A freshly boarded-up house, a few looted cars, a fresh set of footprints carved into the thick layer of dust on the ground.

Seeing such indications of life only reminded him of the life he had with his friends. His friends, who were gone.

His eyes filled with tears at the thought, despite already having cried until he felt dizzy. He fell to his knees, weakened both from his hunger and from the grief overtaking him.

Finding a new life in a new town was all they had hoped for. But now, he didn’t know if he wanted to go on. The two brightest lights in his life had gone out, and it was all _his fault_. If only he had argued more against them, if only he hadn’t been swayed by his own fierce desire to _survive_.

“Hey!” He barely registered the shout that rang across the street. A few moments later, he felt hands wrapping themselves around his arms, steadying him before he fell.

“Oh my goodness…” The same voice whispered. “Is…is it really you?”

He slowly looked up. A familiar face swam into view in front of him, the person’s features full of shock and concern. “Skeppy…?” He croaked.

The person’s eyes widened. “It is! I—I don’t believe it!” Skeppy started to pull him to his feet, but paused, taking in his condition.

“What happened to you?” He whispered, sounding both confused and horrified. “George…you look like a skeleton. I—we thought you were dead.”

_Dead._

_I wish I were._

George began to shake, more tears escaping his eyes. Nothing Skeppy said had registered in his mind, except for that one God-forsaken word.

“George…” The younger man pulled him into a fierce hug.

George melted into Skeppy’s arms, letting out a few quiet sobs. The warmth of the embrace was so familiar, reminiscent of the last few happy hours spent with Dream and Sapnap. But it was undeniably different, and only reminded George more of what he had lost.

Skeppy didn’t comment on the tears, instead choosing to run a comforting hand through George’s hair. “I’m sorry.” He murmured. “I don’t know what you’ve gone through, but I’m so sorry.” He hesitated for a moment, as if afraid to continue. “Are…are Dream and Sapnap…”

George shook his head jerkily. He heard Skeppy’s breath hitch, and the hand in his hair faltered for a moment. “They’re gone.” The older choked out. “It’s all my fault. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Skeppy shushed him gently, pulling him closer. “Nothing is your fault.” His voice trembled as he spoke. “You can’t change what happened.”

“S-Sapnap was injured, I shouldn’t have let him go,” George blurted out, his sentence broken by his wretched sobs. “That idiot…he said h-he wouldn’t survive anyway with his wounds but if I just tried harder…and Dream deserved so much better-” He stopped with a sharp gasp and a heart-wrenching cry.

“You couldn’t have done anything.” Skeppy said firmly. He pulled away from the hug to come face-to-face with George, staring at him with a mixture of determination and sorrow. George gazed blurrily back at him, barely noticing that there were tears in the younger’s eyes too.

“Listen, George.” Skeppy’s voice was serious, more solemn than George had ever heard. “It’s. Not. Your. Fault. You have to know that. Don’t beat yourself up about it. That’ll only make things worse.” The slight desperation in his voice suggested that he was speaking from experience.

George’s breath stuttered. “B-But I—no—they’re…they’re gone…” Another sob fell from his mouth as he gasped for breath. “We had a—a future t-together, why d-did this have to h-happen…”

The younger man was silent for a moment, the hand in George’s hair freezing. “Let’s get you back to my base.” When Skeppy spoke again, his voice was weary and slightly strained. “We can…we can talk there.”

George didn’t resist as Skeppy gently pulled him to his feet. He swayed slightly where he stood, teary eyes fixed on the ground. “Let’s go.” Skeppy murmured, supporting the older man as they began to make their way slowly down the street.

George let his eyes slip shut, exhausted to his very bones. A haze of grief and confusion was consuming his mind, yet his senses were sharper than ever. He could feel dust stirring where his feet landed, brushing against his legs through the rips in his pants. He could smell the ash in the air, and faintly taste blood in his mouth.

He felt the warmth of Skeppy’s arms, half pushing, half carrying him across the street.

But suddenly it didn’t feel warm or familiar anymore. It was foreign, nothing like the embraces that he longed to return to.

Oh God, it really was over. They were never coming back. God it was so cold, the chill of the wind travelling deeper than his fatigue and seizing his heart, and Skeppy’s arms suddenly felt like ice and George tore himself away from them because what was the point anyways, he would never be warm again—

“Hey—hey, are you okay?” George’s eyes flew open, desperate and wild. Skeppy slowly came into focus, a panicked look on his face. “I mean, obviously you’re not _okay_ , but…” The younger man stared at him in concern. “You good?”

George stumbled backwards, shaking his head frantically as Skeppy reached toward him again. The younger man froze, looking alarmed. Guilt flashed momentarily through his mind, but George ignored it and backed further away. “No—I can’t do this—”

A breeze rustled through the area, blowing a few stray cans across the street. George’s voice died in his throat, and he flinched slightly in surprise. The breeze felt warm, warmer than Skeppy’s embrace, warmer than the frigid air around him, warmer than anything he’d felt in days. The wind ruffled his hair and brushed past his hand, its warmth lingering far longer than normal.

It almost felt like a gentle kiss being pressed onto his head, and a phantom (yet familiar) hand brushing against his own.

The image of his friends’ last smiles, full of love, flashed in front of his eyes.

The wind whispered in his ears.

_Stay strong, George._

“...George?” Skeppy asked uncertainly, still frozen awkwardly in the same position.

George raised his trembling hand and brushed the top of his head, his eyes wide. “No.” He whispered again. “No way.”

_You’ll heal._

_You can do this._

_It’s not your fault._

_We love you._

Tears sprang to his eyes again, but for the first time in a week, they weren’t tears of sorrow. George knew now that his friends were right beside him, and that they would always be there, even in death.

With a start, he realized Skeppy was still hovering near him with an apprehensive look on his face. “I—God, I’m sorry.” George hastily rubbed away his tears, letting out a watery, nervous chuckle. “I’m calm now, sorry.”

Skeppy frowned, scrutinizing the older man closely but not moving from his spot. Something in George’s face seemed to reassure Skeppy, because relief flooded his expression and he took a tentative step forward. “You good, man?” He repeated.

“Yeah, yeah.” George muttered, his cheeks flushing slightly. “Uh, sorry about all that…”

Skeppy waved a dismissive hand, a small, rueful grin on his face. “Don’t worry. It happens to all of us.”

George buried his hands in his face, seeming to wilt where he stood. The smile slipped from Skeppy’s face when he realized that the action wasn’t just out of embarrassment. “Are you okay?” He asked, for what seemed like the dozenth time that day.

The older man exhaled slowly before peeking out through his fingers. “I—no. I’m not okay.” George’s voice trembled slightly, but his eyes were no longer glazed over with grief and sorrow. His mind was finally clear, clearer than it had been in days.

Skeppy just looked at him with a mix of relief and sympathy. “I know.” He whispered. When the younger continued, it seemed for a split second as if more than one voice was speaking in harmony with him.

“But you will be.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading this far! 
> 
> i might write more for this au, but i tend to lose motivation very quickly lol
> 
> comments, feedback, and kudos are really appreciated :]


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